Making it financially as a single parent is tough to put it mildly.
You’re own your own. There’s no partner to cover your short comings. If you don’t have all the money to pay a bill then that’s that. Your only other option is to borrow money from a friend or family member which is an absolute last resort in my book.
Making Money Stretch
I used to be a freak when it came to paying my bills on time. I would go into panic mode if I thought my payment would arrive a day late. I still don’t like making late payments but as of now I find it happening a little more than it should.
I don’t get paid much over minimum wage. I get the occasional commission bonus, but honestly it doesn’t amount to much at all. After paying babysitting fees, spending a small amount groceries, and fueling my car back up I have very little money left.
Here lately I have had to use my emergency fund on more than one occasion. I have been taking advantage of the 10 day grace period on my trailer payment, and I have ran my checking account down to a single digit balance.
BUT, I haven’t had to borrow money from anyone. I have made it so far all by myself and for that I am proud.
So, it’s definitely not easy figuring out how to make it on one small income, but it can be somewhat painfully done.
Step # 1 – Make Tons of Sacrifices
There is really no way around this step.
I never thought I would be living in a trailer or living so close to my dad. I really don’t have an option. So, I sacrifice. I live where I can afford to live. I don’t think I can find cheaper living arrangements than the $226 a month I am paying right now. I’ve even thought about buying a foreclosed home for around $50,000 and then pay off my mortgage early. To me this might be a sacrifice worth making.
Of course, not all single parents are low income. I’m sure there are plenty of high earning single parents out there who don’t have to make big sacrifices on living arrangements.
If you’re not one of those high earners then finding a cheap living arrangement is probably the best thing you can do for your budget.
Remember, sacrifices are only temporary.
Step # 2 – You HAVE to Start an Emergency Fund
Last week my computer crashed. I had no back up and my freelance work is really picking up.
To me, my freelance work is my ticket out of a crappy job. I had to get a new computer. I went to Walmart and bought a cheap laptop with money from my emergency fund. I couldn’t cover it with money in my checking. For me, this was an emergency.
I have already made enough money this month to replace what I took out of my emergency fund, which will be top priority. (A lot of the payments I don’t actually receive until the end of the month though.)
A broken computer is a pretty minor emergency. As a single parent you don’t know what will go wrong. You need to have money saved up for life’s emergencies.
I think 6 months worth of expenses is ideal for a single parent. My emergency fund doesn’t have that much in it yet but I hope over the next year that it will.
Start. Saving. Now.
Step # 3 – You Have to Make More Money
Whether you work overtime, go back to school, get a second job, or start your own side business you need to earn more money.
This extra money will help you a.) cover your bills and b.) save for your emergency fund and other needs.
Your side job or second job could also open up a whole new world of opportunities for you. You can find a way to permanently increase your income without working a gazillion hours a week.
Unfortunately for now you need to make the sacrifice and work your butt off for awhile.
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It’s tough being a single parent. Not only financially but also mentally and emotionally. If you can get your finances in order a lot of stress will be lifted from you and every area in your life will start to improve.
There’s no way around making temporary sacrifices to get where you need to be. Just suck it up and get it over with – you’ll be so glad that you did!
“Remember, sacrifices are only temporary” – This is so true and wonderfully stated!!
It was just me and my mom when I was growing up and I never noticed the sacrifices she had to make until I was much older. As I think back to those times, I am amazed how she was able to do all that she did so that we could have a roof over our head, food on the table and clothes on my back. It’s one thing when you are a single person living on your own, it’s quite another when you have little children who are dependent on you. It’s not easy and sometimes I can imagine, it is downright heartbreaking. But you are not settling, you are doing what you can to better your life and theirs….your sacrifices will, in the end, define your character as a person and as a mom! It’s that whole paying your dues thing until you rock your side gigs
Take care Alexa and all the best.
Lyle
Thank you Lyle! I think everything happens for a reason. It sounds like the situation that you and your mother were in made the both of you stronger and closer. And, she taught you a lot of amazing things.
I think that the path my girls and I are on will make us stronger and closer as well. It’s hard sometimes but most of the time we have smiles on our face. I just keep pushin forward because I know I can get to where I want to be.
If you’re only making a little more than minimum wage, then you should be able to make a LOT more money freelance writing. I think it’s awesome that you take so much initiative in your life. So many people become a victim of their circumstances and I can tell that you’re determined to overcome all of your obstacles. Go, you!!!!!
Thanks so much Holly I really appreciate it. I pretty much made the same amount of money freelancing this week as I did at my job and it feels awesome. I just hope that things can continue to pick up they have lately and I’ll be on my way!
My freelancing income doubled after I quit my job because I had the extra time to pursue jobs and complete them. I’m sure the same thing will happen for you. At some point, you’ll just have to take a leap of faith!
Very good initiatives. Yeah need to earn more and save more. At the same time emergency fund raising is very much required as you never know when you need it. You are doing good… Keep it up
Thanks, Rita!
Great Post…it would be wonderful if more people had your mindset. Sacrifice and work your butt off…and you’ll find success. Good luck. I’m with Holly! Go you!
Thanks, Andrew
The truth about how to get ahead financially is simple but I never, ever get tired of hearing about it. Make sacrifices to get expenses down, have some cash saved to cover unexpected costs, and try to earn more. Those truths are awesome. Thanks for this post and I’m signing up for weekly updates, too. Cheers!
Thanks for signing up for the updates
Getting ahead financially is simple but it’s definitely not easy. It takes a lot of work. You do amazing and are a great inspiration!
Alexa, I think you’re doing awesome! I remember vividly my mom’s days as a single parent, and it was tough. Really tough. But you are digging in and doing what you need to do, both by making sacrifices you don’t necessarily want to make, and by working hard to increase your freelance income. Way to go, Alexa; you should be very happy with your accomplishment.
Thanks, Laurie. I really think that at the end of my six month challenge that I will be good to go financially. I have a few more things to do to prepare but it’ll happen!
I think everyone could really benefit from these tips! I also think buying a new computer definitely should have come from the emergency fund. You’re kicking booty and taking names with these freelance jobs, and you really depend on that computer! The fact that you’ve already made enough to replace the funds shows that your sacrifices are paying off. Awesome job.
Thanks, Alexandra. Yeah I think I might die if I didn’t have a computer….or at least go into withdrawals.
I think you are doing great and will do great. Thank you for this post, Alexa.
Thanks, Britnee!
Alexa,
You’re in the right mindset to improve your situation. Have you ever considered getting a duplex and renting one side out. Short term you can also rent out a room which will get your living cost down to zero. Do it for a year, build your income up and your money will work hard for you.
My mom was a single mom until I was a teenager. She certainly was the epitome of a single mom making sacrifices to make life better for me. She was an expert at scrimping, saving and making our money last. For that I’m eternally grateful to her. I never went without and never felt deprived thanks to her clever solutions to problems.
I was also a single parent. What really helped was not having a car for enough time so I could build a good financial reserve. Cars are terribly expensive – if you can do without, you will see a huge difference at the end of the year.
I have so much respect for you, Alexa. Not only are you smart and articulate, you have a great mind-set and manage to stay positive under tough times. I remember a time in my early 30s when all I had was $6/day after paying my bills. That had to cover gas, food, dry cleaning, etc. Mind you, I was single with no children but it still seemed horribly sparse.
That was when I first tried a cash envelope system it worked great for me. I had to train myself to manage money differently because the path I was on led to disastrous results!
You are a bright and shining example for all, Alexa. Keep up the great work!
I HOPE I never have to know what it’s like to be a single mom. I give you ladies (my twin sister included) MAJOR props!
As a product of a single mother, the sacrifices you make for your kids will be something that your kids will really look up to you for later in life. I remember my mom working three jobs to support me and the super lean months we faced before we were able to get child support garnished out of my dad’s salary. Now as an adult, I appreciate all that my mom did for me and this makes me want to help support her financially when she retires.
I have no experience at this so I won’t even bother to offer an opinion, but you are certainly an inspiration for the mothers out there who are in similar situations. Your girls are going to see how you have made opportunities out of bad circumstances and they will learn to do the same when life throws them lemons. Best of luck with your upcoming career change.