Family, Money, & Greed: A Recipe for Lost Relationships

Photo Credit: Artur84

Photo Credit: Artur84

My brother used to be my best friend.

He is two years younger than I am but in high school we were in the same social circle. We would go to parties together, hang out together, and watch out for each other.

We have been through a lot together. When our parents first got divorced and my mom moved us into a very rough neighborhood we stuck together.

My brother once punched one of my boyfriends in the face for calling me some choice words. If someone would mess with me he would take care of it.

Over the past year our bond has been broken and everything has unraveled. I don’t think there’s anything I can do about it.

It All Started With………

The new girlfriend.

She and my brother started dating almost a year ago. When they started seeing each other she had just got released from an 18 month prison stay for selling heroin.

She is 22 years old has 3 kids by two different dads and is an ex-addict of all sorts. Not exactly the type of girl I had hoped my brother would end up with.

But, the thing about my brother is that when it comes to dating he is pretty shallow. And, this girl was hot. (No lie, she is very pretty, not someone you would look at and think has been in prison.)

I wouldn’t give her a fair chance at first. I wanted nothing to do with her and I didn’t want my brother to have anything to do with her either. She was bad news.

Fast forward a couple of months and we ended up hanging out a couple of times. I decided that I did like her, I would give her a chance, and I was embarrassed for being so quick to judge.

Boy, was I dumb.

A few months after them being together I noticed that my brother was looking pretty bad. His face looked sunk in and he just didn’t look or act like his old self.

My brother has one son of his own.

Now he was living in a house with four toddler to preschool aged kids. At first I thought the way he was acting could be due to insanity from being stuck in a small house with so many kids running around, screaming, fighting, and crying.

My gut feeling told me they were into something bad, but who really knows, right?

The First Incident

When I was fixing up the trailer I gave a friend $500 to put in the flooring for me. He took my money and barely did any work. Luckily I backed up his loan with collateral. I had his Thompson Contender pistol with four barrels.

My brother loved the gun. He begged and begged me to sell it to him. But he had no money and wouldn’t pay me what I had in it.

I comprised with him and let him hold onto it and shoot it until I did decide to sell it.

Deciding to Sell

One evening I decided I was ready to sell the gun and was going to list it on the local Facebook yard sale  buy, sell, trade guns page.

I walked over to my brother’s house (who lives next door) to get it. I told him I wanted it back. He said that’s fine but he doesn’t have it on him right now.

Ok, well where is it? I thought.

Something in me already knew where it was and, I was right.

He confessed. He had sold it to my grandma’s gun store for $225 so that he could buy party decorations and a slip ‘n’ slide for his girlfriend’s daughter’s birthday!!!!

He sold MY gun that I have $500 dollars in for $225. Now I was stuck with four barrels that were completely useless without the gun. And he sold MY gun.

WTF!

I was livid. I went to my grandma’s store and bought the gun back for $225. (Now I had $725 in this gun.) I didn’t talk to my brother for two weeks.

When I finally ended up talking to him he agreed to pay me the $225 back at income tax time. He receives his income tax check a couple of weeks later, pays me back, and I forgive him.

He learned his lesson, right?

There’s more to the story. Monday I will finish and let you know what else happened. From what I’ve told you today would you be so quick to forgive? What would you do?

Comments

  1. says

    Considering the situation and pain he is going through, I would forgive him as a brother. Had it been anyone else I wouldn’t do the same. Also I understood that you both share a strong bonding and he was everything for you when your parents separated. I think he deserves the chance once he pays back with income tax check

  2. says

    Yikes~

    Sorry that that happened to you. I would forgive if he was my brother but I would never loan him anything again.
    Funny, he “wanted” the gun so bad, but then he sold it? Sounds very selfish to me.

  3. says

    Definitely a difficult situation. Sorry you’re going through this. My brother-in-law has been doing the same kinds of things for years, and recently it’s gotten worse. I hope this story isn’t going where I think it’s going, but if it is all I can really say is that I wish you and your brother the best. He might need a lot of support going forward, and that might be really hard at times. Don’t forget to get your own support too if you need it.

  4. says

    Alexa, forgive always, but don’t necessarily forget. Remember that forgiveness is for you, and not for him, as is bitterness like taking poison and expecting the other person to die. I’ll have my two cents to add when I hear the rest of the story, as we have several similar situations in our family/friends circle. Many, many hugs to you for what you are going through – I know it’s SO not fun. :-(

  5. says

    I think Laurie gave really good advice. Forgive but don’t forget. I have a sister who is 2 years older and we have always been close and still remain close. So I understand the brother/sister bond. I’d forgive him and remain close to him, as he seems to need some guidance and support, even though he may not know it right now.

  6. says

    This story is going nowhere good, I can tell. I can’t wait for Monday…email me the rest! ;-)

    Speaking of women’s prison, have you watched Orange is the New Black? Awesome series.

    • Alexa says

      No I am cable less! I do sometimes have my mom record TV shows that I really want to watch and I catch up at her house. I’ll tell her to record that one for me.

  7. says

    Oh, Alexa. I don’t like where this story is going. Or the fact that I don’t know if he used the money for a slip n slide or….

    I’m so sorry. I hope it has a happy ending, even if it hasn’t gotten there yet IRL.

  8. says

    I will forgive but not forget. Can’t wait to read the next part. Have a great weekend. @AverageJOe, I heard about that show and I want to see it.

  9. says

    This story seems like it’s going to have a sad ending… and I hope I am wrong. I would forgive my brother, but I think he would also have to earn back my trust over time. I hope everything works out for you guys! There’s nothing harder than strained family relationships.

  10. says

    I thought at one point you were going to say that you thought he was using drugs now but clearly that’s not the case. I would be livid if that happened to me and you have every right to be angry at him. Why do some people think they can do what they want when they want. He must have known he’d have to deal with the fallout at some point and potentially jeopardize your relationship. Pity the gun was worth more to him then the love he has for you. smilex

  11. says

    Sorry to hear about this. Sometimes just because someone is family doesn’t mean that they value you as much as you value them. I haven’t had a problem like that with my siblings but there are issues with cousins borrowing money in my family.

  12. says

    I can relate. I have a younger sister who is somewhat “deranged” and I have had to get a peace order against her at one time just to keep her away. Sometimes blood is crazier than water. I hope it all works out for you and brother.

  13. says

    I was very happy to uncover this web site. I want to to thank you for
    ones time for this wonderful read!! I definitely really liked every bit of it and
    i also have you saved to fav to see new information in your blog.

    Can I just say what a comfort to find a person that really understands what they
    are talking about on the net. You definitely know how
    to bring a resolution to light and make it important.
    A lot more people ought to check this out and understand this side of
    your story.

    Excellent article. I absolutely love this site. Continue
    the good work!

    It’s hard to find well-informed people in this particular topic, however,
    you seem like you know what you’re talking about!
    Thanks.

    A fascinating discussion is definitely worth comment.

    that you ought to write more on this subject matter, it
    might not be a taboo matter but usually people do not
    speak about such topics. To the next! Thanks!!

    Hi! I just want to give you a big thumbs up for the excellent information you have got right here on this post.
    I’ll be coming back to your blog for more soon.

    Spot on with this write-up, I actually think this helpful website needs far more attention.
    I’ll probably be returning to see more, thanks for
    the information!

    I like reading a post that can make people think. Also, thanks for allowing me to
    comment!

    Right here is the perfect site for anyone who hopes to understand this topic.
    You realize a whole lot its almost tough to argue with
    you (not that I really will need to…HaHa). You definitely
    put a new spin on a subject that has been discussed in a long while.

    Excellent stuff, just excellent!

    Aw, this was an incredibly good post. Spending some
    time and actual effort tto create a superb article… but what can
    I say… I procrastinate a lot and don’t manage to get anything done.

    I’m impressed, Ihave to admit. Seldom do I come across a blog that’s both educative
    and interesting, and let me tell you, you’ve hit
    the nail on the head. The problem is something too few folks
    are speaking intelligently about. Now i’m very happy
    that I came across this during my search for something regarding this.

    After going over a few of the blog articles on your web page, I honestly appreciate your way
    of writing a blog. I book-marked it to my bookmark website list and will be
    checking back soon.

    This excellent website really has all of the info I needed about this subject
    and didn’t know who to ask.

    There’s definately a great deal to know about this issue.
    I really like all the points you’ve made.

    You made some decent points there. I looked on the internet to find out
    more about the issue and found most individuals will go along
    with your views on this web site.

    Good post. I learn something new and challenging on websites I stumbleupon
    every day. It’s always exciting to read through content from other authors and use
    something from other sites.

    I blog frequently and I genuinely appreciate your information.
    The article has really peaked my interest.
    I am going to book mark your blog and keep checking for new information
    about once a week. I subscribed to your RSS feed as well.

    Nice! This has been a really wonderful post. Thank you for
    supplying these details.

    Having read this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you spendinng some time and effort to
    put this content together. I once again find myself spending way too much time both reading and leaving comments.

    I want to to thank you for this excellent read!! I absolutely loved
    every little bit of it. I have you saved aas a favorite to look at new stuff you post.

    I used to be able to find good advice from your blog posts.

    Good post! We are linking to this great content on our site.
    Keep up the good writing.

    That is a very good tip particularly to those new to the blogosphere.
    Brief but very accurate information… Thank you for sharing this one.

    A must read post!

    I could not refrain from commenting. Perfectly written!

    bookmarked!!, I like your web site!

    ISaved as a favorite, I love your website!

    Very good article. I am dealing with a few of these issues as well..

    Some extremely valid points! I appreciate you penning this
    post and also the rest of the site is really good.

    Excellent blog you have here.. It’s hard to find quality writing like yours nowadays.
    I really appreciate people like you! Take care!!

    This is a topic that’s near to my heart… Best wishes!

    I like it when folks come together and share ideas. Great website, stick with
    it!

    Good information. I discovered your website by accident (stumbleupon).
    I’ve saved as a favorite for later!

  14. Alvin says

    Someone essentially help to make severely articles I’d state.
    That is the very first time I frequented your web page and so far?
    I amazed with the research you made to make this particular publish amazing.
    Great job!

Trackbacks

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>